As the new year settles in, so does my never ending list of goals and aspirations. Buuuuut I got burnt out, and ran to my comfort anime to get me out of it. Kiki's Delivery Service is a slice-of-life movie that makes me go DAMN, that IS life. Hayao Miyazaki does an amazing job of making comforting anime with deep meaning, and Kiki's, for short is my favorite.

For context, I have always been a hard worker, working 2 or 3 jobs while in school full-time. Now, I'm working two jobs with 50 million creative endeavors. I’m used to working BUT that means I’m used to burnout. The feeling of feeling like a failure is all too familiar to me. This time when turning to Kiki’s to get me out of my slump, I learned a little more about myself.

Working early, makes you grow up early.

Kiki sets off to go on her own at 13. Now I understand this is a work of magical fiction, and it’s a witch tradition, but 13 is young. Kiki doesn’t interact with anyone her age in the film except for Tombo. And while she wanted to go to the aviation party, it wasn’t her priority. It made me think of all the hangouts and parties I avoided because of work. If work itself wasn’t the issue, I was far too tired and felt I had no place in that crowd. What did my friends know about work and how drained I was? I never wanted to burden them with it. Just as Kiki turned down the blimp ride, she felt like she was in a different world than them. Mind you she was younger than them!

The rush towards independence pushed her away from her peers and her youth. Once she learns her lesson, she hangs out with the kids and is MUCH happier. What did being overworked as a teen do for me if I still feel the same way at almost 24? To make up for lost time, I reach out to friends when I can. I try not to say no to trips and outings. I’m healing overworked me, and using my money how I want. Work should be rewarding and not demanding. 

Everything takes time and effort, and people put it towards YOU.

My blood boils when Kiki delivers the pie to the old lady’s granddaughter, and the child opens it in disgust. They spent hours working on the pie, and Kiki delivered it in the RAIN. And yet the granddaughter was ungrateful. I struggle to decide what I should get from this scene. Should I learn that nothing matters, and I should be more shellfish with my time? Or realize that even though it might not seem like it, my effort is appreciated by someone?

While Kiki didn’t get to the party, she earned a new friend. She was also thanked greatly for her efforts. But, how do I decide if something will waste my time? What if I don’t earn anything, or my time and energy aren’t respected? There is no way to know, so I’ll continue to do my best for others. Of course, keeping in mind my bandwidth. In turn, I appreciate those who sacrifice for me. Whether they put in a lot of effort, or not, I recognize every kind gesture.

Your hobbies and skills aren’t what defines you as a person.

I truly believe there is a way to use your hobbies for profit without them becoming unenjoyable. To find the balance you have to know when to separate your life from work. I love content creation, from cosplay to streaming. I love it! Kiki taught me, if I wish to keep love for what I do, I have to tone it down. Before, I would cosplay, check my analytics, get depressed, and repeat the cycle. I was engulfed but felt I wasn’t respected. Eventually, I started to lose respect for myself AND my craft.

I know it’s easy to say “Just stop caring.” but honestly that’s what I had to do. Like Kiki, I didn’t get my magic back until I hit rock bottom and took a break. This happened SEVERAL times until I learned my lesson. I only cosplay when I feel the spark and the results are better than when I pushed myself too hard. Kiki still does deliveries, but her self-worth isn’t tied to how well she does her job, so why should mine? 

Work CAN'T be your everything. As much as I love my work and my hobbies, I have to have time to rest. I have to hang out with my friends and not repeat what I did when I was young. My favorite way to rest is to have a self care day! And, if we have the bandwidth, we should do good, and appreciate those who do good for us.

What started as just a comfort anime turned into something much more for me. I will carry this movie and it's lessons with me always. Are there any lessons you’ve learned from anime let me know below! Remember to rest and put yourself first!